too many love songs

Beware All! Gushy reflection up ahead!!
I've been listening to sappy, love songs all day and that is why I am writing this blog entry... because I'm just in that kind of mood.  Here is the development of my love life over the years in the summary three songs.

Song 1:  Everything by Michael Buble

So this weekend Yaotshing and I rented a lot of movies and just stayed in and ate junk food (which means Yao watched me chow down on lots of potato chips and candy bars).  Our favorite movie was The Five Year Engagement.  Yao and I had a great time talking about how we first met, what led to dating, that led to marriage, to our careers.  It's a great movie and I'd recommend it to most couples out there, though it does have some explicit scenes I'd only ever watch with Yaotshing.  I know just about every couple I've talked to can relate to the challenges in this movie.  It's really strange to think back to a time when Kashia was not around, even though she's only been with us for a year now.

Yao and I had a really unhealthy beginning to our relationship.  (since I'm older now and married I can be honest) We were just OBSESSED with each other, and we were young... and snuck around when we really should have been doing other things. I know every new couple goes through that stage where you just want to be together all the time.  I know now, after 5 years of dating and 5 years of marriage with Yaotshing, we kind of wish that the obsessive stage was shorter- well between the two of us, my grades definately suffured more.  There were a lot of very important things going on in high school and college that we paid no attention to because everything was just an obstacle to being able to call or see each other.  Love now looks very different than the love that we had for one another years ago.

I think that over time, even when the fullness of that love deflates (I'd say the fullness of "that" love was probably experienced around the time we got married), we continue to move through the motions of what we think that love should look like.  I don't know if I can measure whether I love Yaotshing any more or any less than "that" time, but I know my heart is full.

Song 2: Follow Through by Gavin DeGraw

I heard this song on the radio this morning and it reminded me of a time when Yao and I were young and would make so many ridiculous promises to each other.  I think that with each promise you declare, in that moment, you truly think that you'll be able to follow through.  However, time weighs in, as well as many other priorities, and those promises soon fall apart.

I can't tell you how many arguments Yao and I had over not being able to keep our word.  I mostly am so quick to make claims about my willingness to do this or that, and never get around to it, or just flatly forget.  Yao on the other hand is more so pressured by me to make promises, so when he doesn't fulfill them, it's my fault not his.  The lyrics of this song are really impractical "if you want to be with me, you'll have to follow through with every word you say."  But I think that it shows us that if we are going to make promises, vows, declarations, we should only be saying what we are capable of following through with.

I think ultimately I would hold Yaotshing to the promises he made before God at our wedding and at Kashia's child dedication ceremony...
 
Cause lets's face it, my ring isn't going to get any bigger...

(I just loveeee Gavin as a singer/song writer.... he is AMAZING!)

Is it strange that I think Gavin DeGraw is cute.. and yet he kind of reminds me of Carol's son Toby?? hahah!! I think it's the eyebrows and long face. haha

You need to play this next song as you are reading the rest of this entry: ....:) For sure. hah!

Song 3: Wanted by Hunter Hayes

'Cause everything that don't make sense about me
It makes sense when I'm with you

Isn't it funny that the more years you spend together and the more you grow individually, the more you two compliment each other? hahaha, really though.  I think Yaotshing and I definitely make up for each other's shortcomings and weaknesses.  I just hope, at the end of the day, that what we will be enough to set the right example for Kashia.

I really connected with the lyrics of Wanted because I think everyone in a relationship, at some point, wants to be reminded that they are "wanted" especially after SO MANY YEARS. Something Yaotshing always says when he sees Jennifer Aniston playing a role of a woman dumped "That guy is dumb, he doesn't even know how lucky he is!" Hahahah! sorry that is just strange to me. But anyways, my point is that I usually sit there and say back, "Don't you know how lucky you are?" and then he laughs while I give him a glare. At some point you start doubting that your partner see's what you bring to the relationship- your beauty, your knowledge and wit, your love, your forgiveness and willingness to overlook those nasty habits... list goes on as I'm using myself as an example. HAHA! Don't take your partner for granted y'all! :P Make em feel wanted every now and then.

This last song was played so many times today I think I'm going be sick.
Ok that's it. Goodnight.:)